Friday, 27 November 2009

I am here

They wouldn't treat a dog the same way. Tubes in the nose, mouth, front and rear, seeping painful wounds, abcesses and a scar from neck to navel. There you have it. Humanity, a hypocritically hypocratic oath which could probably better be described as an attempt to extend a painful existence to its most horrendous and torturous end.

So there we are, this is where we have arrived after a month in the same situation. The doctor's only words - "Well if he hadn't been so fit he would have died a long time ago." Please forgive me for saying this, but I thought we lived in an age of reason, an age where we understood how people think and feel, and where we take innordinate care over everything we say and do as we are aware of the infinite number of possibilities that are affected by our actions.

Apparently not. We have a society where the quick fix, the throwaway feelings, the young and instable desires have come to mean everything. Once you have passed that stage then you are no more than an old written off car that has to be crushed and dumped on to the nearest heap. Added to which, a large helping of suffering is administered to remind you of the crime of having survived so long, and having forced many innocent young poeple to work so hard for so long to support you.

Suicide has always seemed like the cheap way out to me,like the escape route, the way you go when you can't handle the cards you've been dealt. So help me god, someone shoot me.

As with all things in this world, it isn't like we haven't had warning. George Orwell has given a pretty scarily accurate account of what life is slowly becoming and Aldous Huxley wasn't far behind where we are now with the 'Brave New World' we are living in. Nobody reads any more, and actually using your intellect is looked down upon. My students don't even understand how to open a book, and their only leisure activity is shooting moving objects. Is someone out there laughing?

Perhaps if we had bothered to take note of the many people with a vision to what was our most likely future and what was happening around us, we might have been able to keep those days when we were able to live comfortably with what we had. Loved our elders instead of viewing them as a carcass ready to throw out, challenged without disrespecting, and had some notion of what it is to love another human being rather than just looking for the next cheap fix. Two world wars and the megalomaniac has got his way after all. A society obsessed with image, that recoils at the old, that hates all it doesn't understand, has a warped love for the little it does, has no notion of its own heritage, and has lost all common sense a paragraph or two ago.

Humanity has managed to disgust me once again. Will someone please turn it all off please?